Girls and makeup

My parents were very militant about not letting me wear makeup, which just pushed me into sneaking into doing it on my own. By high school I was full on goth. I loved it, still do, though I don't put on the full get-out much anymore. Not much point when I'm sitting around the house playing sub-rural housewife. I will say, if you can learn to put liquid eyeliner on on the school bus, you can put it on anywhere.

My kids play around a bit with my makeup at home, and occasionally at friends'. I'm trying to lay the foundation now for understanding "too much" and technique. My oldest had to wear some for a dance recital, though I made sure it was as neutral and natural as possible for a 5 year old. Just enough to emphasize the eyes and lips under the glare of stage lights.

I'm gonna play it by ear as to when to let my 2 girls wear makeup. I do think that some of the timing has to be based on what is the social norm among their peers. I'm not planning on encouraging them to wear makeup just because "everyone else is." But I do know that if I hard line against it, they are likely to try to do it behind my back. With a Scorpio and a Capricorn-cusp-Sagittarius, I'm planning ahead. I figure, if/when they start asking about it, I'll slowly permit them different things, and let them pick to some extent. Maybe starting with lip gloss and/or translucent powder, and on from there.

Once girls reach puberty (which seems to happen younger and younger,) and start the "joys" of womanhood, they want to grasp any element they can to help them understand that new identity. Makeup doesn't HAVE to be part of that, but in the age of peer pressure, it's tricky figuring out how to explain that, and have it sink in. My thought is that they're more likely to listen if I give them a choice. Then I can tell them that it's ok with me if they wear some makeup, and that if they prove to me they can wear it responsibly, I'll give them more latitude. I can also tell them that if they decide they don't want to wear makeup, they don't have to. A subtle bit of reverse peer pressure. I'm not flat out saying, "Just because all the other girls are doing it, doesn't mean you have to." That kind of thing put ME on the defensive as a tween/teen. Instead, it's just a whisper in the back of their mind that they can choose to latch onto if they want, as if it were their own idea.